There are few things more daunting than trying to find a full-time job in a large city.
Add to that a position in your field with a decent wage and benefits within less than six months of looking? You might have a better chance of getting struck by lightning – twice.
Yes, finding a job can be difficult, to say the least. With the millennial unemployment rate more than double the rest of the population’s, one out of three 25–29 year-olds are underemployed, and over 60% of us carrying an average debt of $27,000, the job market is not a place we want to be.
If you are currently riding the unemployment train, we know your pain. And if you have an unemployed friend, buy them a cookie or give them a hug – they probably need it.
Here’s a look into the absolute worst things about the job hunt:
Creating a resume that makes your not-so-extensive experience sound impressive.
You can call a gas station attendant a petroleum engineer right?
Spending endless hours sifting through the job postings
Only to find that a) you aren’t qualified for any of the jobs you want; and b) seeing that over 300 people have already applied for the jobs you are qualified for.
Writing dozens of cover letters a day like it’s a full-time job.
Because, sadly, it kind of is your job.
Applying to companies with super long application processes. Or a barely functioning online application system.
I mean, thank the high-and-mighty that you don’t have to go door to door anymore to deliver your resume, but a 50-question questionnaire for every single applicant is a little much.
Job titles that don’t match the reality of the job.
Listen, a job that literally entails dressing up as a giant slice of pizza and handing out fliers on the street should not be called something like Regional Marketing and Communications Director.
Realizing there was a typo in the application you just sent to a potential employer.
Or worse, when you realize that you sent a cover letter with the wrong company name.
Everyone constantly asking you if you have found a job yet.
Because, you know, after weeks – if not months – of searching for a job, you wouldn’t tell anyone when you finally got one. Just kidding. YOU WOULD SCREAM IT FROM THE ROOFTOPS AND EVERYONE AND THEIR MOTHER WOULD KNOW.
Applying to an internship, a part-time job, or a job that will barely pay enough to cover your rent…
…because you have lost all hope of getting a full-time job that pays well.
Stalking potential employers, co-workers, and your competition on LinkedIn. And then panicking when you remember they can see that you looked at their profile.
The internet gods obviously hate you.
Waiting to hear something – anything – from all of the companies you applied to.
Waiting. Still waiting. Crickets.
Recruiters who set up phone interviews and then never call.
These people are just the worst.
Preparing flawless answers for the interview you finally landed, only to be asked none of the questions you expected.
Well, at least your outfit was #onpoint.
When you have to answer the question: Why do you want to work here?
“Umm… because I need a job (please?!)”
Employers who insist on knowing your salary history.
But act like you requested top secret burn-after-reading files when you ask what the position pays.
Waiting to hear if you got the job.
Again, waiting. More waiting. Still waiting.
Being rejected for your “lack of experience.”
Even though it was good enough to land you an interview. And how the f@!$ are you supposed to build your experience if no one will give you a job in the first place?!
Being rejected with a TEMPLATE rejection email.
[insert name of poor, unemployed schmuck here].
Starting the hunt all over again, watching your hopes and dreams die a slow painful death.
And then seriously considering moving back into your parents’ basement for the free food and rent.
Finally getting the job (Hooray! Money!). Then realizing you can’t make your own schedule anymore and have to “adult.” Every. Single. Day.
Good news is you got the job; bad news is you have to get out of your pyjamas every day. You win some, you lose some.